Auntie Stella

23. Will mbanje cure my shyness

Theme: Growing up
Speaking out

Dear Auntie Stella

I am a 16 year old boy in Form 3. I have a big problem because I am very shy with girls. Sometimes I can’t even look at them. My friends keep telling me if I smoke mbanje I will find it easier to approach girls.

All my friends have girlfriends and I feel left out and lonely. I want a girlfriend, but I don’t want to smoke mbanje, so what can I do?



Talking points

  • Is shyness a problem for many teenagers? Is it more common in boys or in girls?

  • Do a lot of people you know only want girlfriends or boyfriends because everyone else has them? Is this a good reason to have a relationship?

  • Will mbanje help Philani? Why or why not? What about alcohol or other drugs?

  • What advice can you give Philani…

a) about overcoming his shyness?

b) about making friends with girls?

c) about smoking mbanje?

d) about having girlfriends at his age?